Thursday, January 28, 2010

Melaka-ing

A new start

Hey peeps, i've moved to Melaka since Tuesday.
Coz the registration was on Wed, and i got the orientation
time table, guess wat.i skipped evrything, yes EVRYTHING.
All those endless course briefing, programme briefing,blah blah blah..
As i had plenty of seniors to brief me.lol.
So, my housemates were quite nice.typical study kind of boys.
They were 4 of them.yeap.4guys in the house.
Go to class in the morning and Dota for endless time at night.
And fooling around the house.anyway, they were good ppl i believe.hah.
Im not new to something like adapt myself to a new place.
And definitely not new to things like making new friends.
but it always take time for sure.
I just felt reluctant to fit in to a new group of ppl.
Tats AWM like i gues.its just me.lol
So, as a good housemate(wtf), i've cooked them dinner today.
few dishes and ask them to tapao rice.
LOL.although its like months ago since i last cooked,
but still things goes smoothly.im glad the food was still acceptable.hah.
And actually gone abit emo coz i miss evrything of INTI laa.
coz im not ready for a new life yet.
Im sick of socializing.sick of making new friends.
sick of leaving places im already used to.
sick of doing all these shit all over again.
like wat i've done before when im in secondary, when i left Staj
(my first secondary skul).
And when i left my most memorable secondary school life.
okay.i noe its kinda crap coz thats just a process of growing up.LOL
process of learning to face all those shit that might happen in our life.
cut the craps.class will be started on monday.
and gues wat, my senior told me that there will definitely
include subject like econs and account!
wtfffff!!!!!!wil be facing my 'long lost enemy' again!ROFL
OMG.(not again!after the freaking 8months of SAM).
bless me.i will survive!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Speechless

At this moment, i felt really speechless.
My mind recalled back the moment when i was pushed out from
the operation theathre and the first thing i did
was check on my hp.
I saw your msg, i stil clearly emember at that moment,
i cant even talk nor move and im shivering coz im freezing.
But i insisted to my mum that i wan to reply that msg.
I still remember u did replied my msg.and i fall unconcious after that.
I was awaked after few hours and i thought of you.
At that very particular moment where i need u the most,
or should say i need encourage and care the most,
u kindly ignore me.opps,dun wronged me.i didnt blame u for tat.
I waited and waited for ur cals or msg,but not even a single
act or words come from u.i got back home and i realised that
afterall i must always learn to count evrything on myself like i always does.
never have any expectation nor hope on others.
because they will never fullfill it .
Even they used to be ur best jimui, but there will be no forever.
I was tryin to move on without u in my life,
i still keeping faith in myself although i know
the possibilities was very little.
When i finally decide to leave, u appeared again.
and mess up my mind.thanks alot.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Without health, we are just nth.

Without health, we are just nth.

I have been lying in the hospital for the past 4nights and tonight
wil be the last night coz
i am goin to be discharged tomorrow.
Its a really good and extreme experience as
this was the very first time i was admitted for operation since i was born.
After been through those moments, when i was being pushed into the
operation theatre, as shown in the tv.
lying on the surgery desk with the light on my face.
When i was given anaethestic, i felt like
a frog that was waiting for the doc to cut my stomache.
i felt so helpless, although evryone told me i wil be fine.
at that particular moment, i feel like burst out cryin.
but i noe it wouldnt help much.so i hold it back.
After the operation, i was awaked by the anaethestic doc.
Felt pain on my abdomen, and face difficulties
goin to the toilet.needed the nurse to assist me.
i cant even wake up from the bed without the nurse.
only that moment, i realised how important health was
deeply inside ur heart core, when u need help to clean urself,
when u actually need ppl to put on ur pants for u.
and when u cant eat anything except porridge and fruits.
My dad said this thing grow becoz of my upside down lifestyle.
I recalled back the past few months when im studyin at Inti.
Late night supper evrynight, hitting the clubs almost evry week, alcohol,
lack of water, and improper food without enough nutritions.
Well, thats my dad saying.coz things happen for reason.
im not sure how this thing came up to me.
but im sure its a warning before i get into something worst.

Thanks for my friends from KBCA that visited me and also Chern,u guys really touched me.
And felt dissapointed for my friends who didnt come and visit me.
although i know u guys were busy and maybe u guys were facing
transport problems but just felt sad when my dad ask what my friends were for.
i sincerely knew they were concern about me.but,they dun just hav the time i gues.
I know its a rather emo post, but no offence lahh, just to
express my feelings.its a torture to lie down here for days
and doin the same thing evryday.checking fb, watching dramas as if
im a disabled person.but stil thanks to my peeps who smsed me or called
to concern about me.=)
i still need some time to fully recover from it.might
face some difficulties when doin some daily chores.but im sure im able to
handle it.=)

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Blood cysts..

Bloody hell Blood CYSTS

Guys, im still alive.dun hav to worry.
Just went through an operation to take off the blood cysts from my ovary.
i hav been fasting for more than 24hours after and before the sugery
tat really makes me depressed.LOL.
after the bloody hell surgery, i was forced to wake up to pee which
i never thought even pee can cause so much pain.swt.
feel pain but cant be given pain killer injection so frequent.
hav to bear it .lol.wtf.
the doc came in the morning and show me the photo of the cyst
amd gave me a dvd of the operation.
make me wan to puke when i saw few mins of the video.
heres the bloody hell pic.
just wan to say.guys.take good care of urself.and drink lotsa water.
i bet u will not want to go through this!


Thursday, January 14, 2010

Sjmc

Hospitalized

Guys, plan to melaka hav to be delayed due to personal health reason.
This is how it happen.
Went for a whole body medical check up
and went for ultra sound when the doc said my stomache was hard.
And realised that my stomached are grewing bigger and bigger
not becoz im fat!its is because of a bloody hell big blood cysts inside my abdomen.
woohoo.not sure to sad or happy when i heard this.
the doc said it is huge and hav no other choice but take it off.
so.today is the first day im admitted to SJMC.
did a CT scan that made me cry like a baby just now.wtf.
coz it hurt.poke here poke there.ISH.
will update soon if im still alive.LOLLL..



Tuesday, January 12, 2010

'm leaving.

'm leaving

Hey guys, actually noticed that i didnt really mention
about my study plan and where am i heading after SAM.
SO here is it.due to the not very excellent result,
my dad prefered me to re-do my foundation in Multimedia University Melaka,
which was the Foundation In Law where the intake will be on june.
As wat my cousin lawyer said, u need to strengthen ur basic
nicely before u get to degree level, dun ever underestimate the syllabus.
well.there goes the plan, to prevent myself from rotting at home for the
coming 6months, my dad suggested me to take a course just to pass my time.
I know it sounds lame.and i actually started to feel reluctant to leave
my swweeet home.but once he decided, theres no more choices left.
so i chose the easiest course ( I think lah), foundation in management,well
it did sounds easier compare to others like engineering,hell NO, biological
science,No! not this one,creative multimedia?nyahh..
Tats it.im moving in a apartment to stay with four guys as
one of them was my fren.LOL.i noe this idea sounds Weird too.
but.trust me.i dun really have choice!
i felt so miserable moving to another new place.
with things starting all over again.
goin to make new frens?okay .i doubt that actually.
adapt myself to the new environment?wil try me best.
get used to home sick as my dad said i only get to come back
ONCE in a month?WTF!
actually feel like crying.
why was he sending me to place further and further?
nilai?MELAKA???OMG.
peeps.promised me u guys will visit kay?*sniff*
i will miss u guys.=(

Sunday, January 10, 2010

my sunday =)

my long lost sunday=)

its been ages since i last went to KBCA.
today was the first day of dharma class after two months of school holiday.
As usual, i went there early in the morning but was abit late.
A lot of new students enrolled especially primary one kids.
i have to admit that, some kids were really annoying and they
really can pissed u off!
Its a good way to practice ur patience when facing those monster.
but sincerely im sucks in these.
i shouted,yelled, and confronted them this morning.haha
im not really a good prefect thou.some of my prefect friends
really have great patience in handling those lil monster.sigh.
Well, i felt good doin things tat i used to do.
Taking care of those kids, arranging the books for the ceremony.etc.
i can always find the long lost peacefulness in Kbca.
not sure whether im able to continue the job as a prefect as
i will be away from home for my studies.still unknown.
Well, other than that, i went to S.piramid in the afternoon.
with my cousin sis to just loitre around and also meeting SEF.
OMG.i really miss her.and im damn emo when we actually heading
two different direction to go back . =(
fate brought us together, im sure that the damn thing
will pacth us back together also.i sincerely believe in that!

Beside that, i actually drove all the way from Bukit tinggi Aeon to subang,
and took a wrong turn and came back to Bukit Raja JJ!
And drove from Bukit Raja to sunway again!
wtf.i m so dead!

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Untitled

Untitled

5.1.10
It’s the N times that he promised or should said he said that he will find me but he didn’t.
It’s been days since we last met.its been days since we talked.i miss him.i really do.
And I hate him for creating memories that are tearing yheart to pieces at this moment.
I hate him for leaving me the things that remind me of him.its suffering.it really do.
Ppl always said time can heal evrthing.but, how many time I will used up for these?
I lost evrything.my confidence,my dignity,my own value.why ?why am I doing these to myself?
I couldn’t help it.maybe its just the mean time im feeling so.im so confused.im so helpless.
I didn’t hope for things that I know I don’t deserve it.i just want to do things that I want
To make meself feel better.things turn out to become worse.

To dear whoever u are,
I miss u.i knew I did.i always did.almost evry sec.ur smile pop out in my mind.
But I cant do anything about it.i just can bear all these by myself.im sorry I texted u today.
I didn’t mean to interupt u or become ur burden.although its not my fault to fall for u
But I noe I did a very wrong thing by tellin u about it.or maybe u dun really take it serious.
And u do noe about how I feel and u just dun giv a damn about it.but im really sorry if
I cause u any trouble.i think I did.i shouldn’t hav done that.just feel guilty.

To dear wan min,
U are stupid, do u noe that.u are typing all ur damn feeling inside a lappie that u never did before!
Never!not even when the last broke up.u laughed at immature gals that cried over their r
elationship,criticise their immaturity, why are u doin the same thing.i noe u are dyin inside.i noe u are
suffering.i noe u cant let go.i noe its hard not to contact.but does tat make any difference when u are
facing the same shit all over again???any difference?implanting those hopes and bullshit expectation
of urs doesn’t help!wake up.and c wat the fuck u are doin!have u ever think before what he is doin ther
actually tearing here?hahahaha..isnt that sounds ridiculous?promise urself treat urself better kay?

Friday, January 1, 2010

My Very first New Year Eve countdown with my peeps =)

My Very first New Year Eve countdown with my peeps =)

Happy new year to all of my readers..its 2010..
which mean it will be the beginning of evry good things
and end of evry single Bad thing.
Actually i used to celebrate my new year eve with my family.
but.this time, i got the chance to go wild with my peeps.
at first, the plan was The curve.
but due to most of them ffk.
escpecially Juh yen..and Kelming(although we dont really care).
we changed our plan to sunway .
And at last MOS!
its the very first time i club with joe and kev.
which was a blast last night.i enjoyed the night
althought its really crowded and the cover charge for guys was Rm90.
fKing expensive.
And greatest of all.Mona got drunk after only few cups of liquor.
Heres some of the pics we took.
check out my facebook for more pichass. =)

Joe, Lee Vee and me