Thursday, July 25, 2013


Just read one of my bestie's blog about whats the reason of us blogging
still even till now when friends around us are ditching it slowly
and all their blogs are long neglected.
As what she mentioned in her blog, at first we blog for attention,
hope someone who cares will read our blog and etc but
now its like we wish to leave some footprints
and memories in a particular month or particular day to be
reminisced sometime later in the future.
She was right about that because i always find myself
linger around my own blog even though i have no new updates,
but i will just scroll to my old blog post and read what i've written down.
its fun, because human mind changes all the time, maybe at that 
moment i have that thought but i might think differently now when i 
read back the post and big possibility i will laugh at myself for being
so emotional or even stupid .
Anyway, nothing special recently. Just done the stupid surgery one month ago,
but i was back to school one week after i rest myself at home because
it was dead boring !! even i have tons of MC to be fully utilized but ughhh..
And yes, i've gone through the whole nightmare again.
Just done most of my midterm papers and tons of assignment deadlines
are waiting ahead. hopefully i could finish all by next week and there goes 
my holiday awaiting. My friend said i need a life goal so that i can keep 
myself occupied finding ways to achieve it... Well, i have never think of
that because all i want now is to graduate, get a job and pay my loan.
Goal of my life. Hmm. I think i need to come up with something like
mostly guy will say i want a lamborghini before 30 or earn the first bucket of gold before
30 or etc. Will go figure it out.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Third Year

Entering Third Year of LLB indicates that there is still
half way to go till i complete my law degree.
Watching people around me graduate and start seeking for job
kinda stress me out, especially those started saving money
for houses, increases the pressure along as well.
Started to think how well can i afford myself if i graduate
and start my first job and receiving least salary a chambee can get.
Well, doesn't really wanna stress myself out with all these shit yet because
it's only the second week of the semester and i've attended all the third year subjects lecture
in this two weeks and made me horridly realized it wasn't as easy as i thought,
i mean no one ever told me it will be easy but at least i thought i could handle it.
But after all the lectures, i was wrong. Everything was just so new to me
and it took me 200% of attention to just figure out what was the lecturer talking about.
ok lah. stress enough with all these study shit and busy semester with my retake subjects
a idiot cyst decided to come out from nowhere and i have to surgically remove it asap.
It was set on this Friday. Since i have been through the same nightmare three years ago,
i knew how the whole things work but still, poking my vein to give me dropping still freaks me out.
Its been some time since i last blog, trying to link all my words to sentence giving me a hard time.
Thats it. Till then.


Thursday, April 18, 2013

Good old days

Went to a bike session with my girls
and remind me of the good old days
we spent together ...
When all of us were still single,
spent our time partying together,
studying together,
having countless sleep over,
messing around with each other (well we still does that now)
Nevertheless, miss those days when there were
less boundaries and restriction because
all of us were still searching for the special someone.
As much as i miss the old days we had together,
still, we gotta move on.
This if life.
But i guess everyone is satisfied with what we have now
and peaceful life is what we've got right now.
As what my dad told me,
restriction and boundaries is anyhow needed.
Live with it :)

Tuesday, April 2, 2013


Have you ever done something stupid
like hoping to bump into someone
wherever you go for no reason
just because you miss him ?

Yes, i've done this a hundred times in my mind.
Naked face  x Naked Feelings

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Busy bee

Been busy busy and busy.
Well, being busy is good
i rather be busy than killing flies.
Having midterm in this two weeks
and finally felt overwhelming when all
the works and study come pilling up.
Lesson learnt (normally day dreaming in the class)
When you try to catch up all the stuff that
you've missed in two or three days time,
spell HELL.
Gonna hang on no matter what,

Be loyal to someone because you love him/her not because you are afraid of him/her.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Time Flies.

Was doing random stuff out of boredom,
such as disturbing online friend on fb chat
just to annoy them but as i scroll down the list,
there are people that i hardly talk to and
ended up reading my old, rusty blog that was deserted
from time to time when i lost interest to blogging.
Well, this always happen.
Guess the most prominent thing that i could blog about
this few months would be my uhh.. birthday ??
YEAH .. turned 22 last month.
Since i am already an adult, warm birthday celebration was
out of the list,  buffet party was excluded (mum said no more)
Ended up having a pre-celebration at the club where me
and gfs hang out most  before I went back forCNY.
Pop the most disgusting champagne (i hate champagne)
The bright side of it, i've got a three layer cake first time of my life.

Thing doesn't go as well as i expected on my actual day,
though candle light dinner is cheesy,
fireworks are too mainstream,
roses are so common
but still , girls being girls.
I've got the most expensive pressie ever and i am thankful for that
but turns out it wasn't really the thing that i want.
I had the suck-est Valentine this year,
no actual birthday celebration (my birthday is just next to V day so there's nothing to hope for)
and this is just the beginning and all the first time were ruined.
Not to mention my Christmas, new year, valentine and yes birthday.
I just hope things will be better if there will be a second and third and so on.

Just wondering,
Does life have to be so miserable when you are in a rs?
Its like everything was bind to it,
You start changing to the person he or she wants you to be,
start giving all your time to him and losing yours,
listen and actually obeys to every single advice he had given or
should i say instruction even when you know its bullshit deep down inside
Stop expanding your social circle because he thinks people in a relationship
can never make friends and yes at the same time giving up your own social circle.
Ok, im just too bored and all these shit just came out from no where.
And i feel like i am becoming one of those mentioned,
which is pathetic .. Why can't relationship be happy all the way,
with less restriction and boundaries, more trust and freedom.
Why the hell guy must be the one who is superior in a rs?
Hello, everything is about equality and you can't be like
oh, because you are a girl.. well eff you bias bitch.
Just think life is so unfair to girls sometimes,
if you are lucky, you meet someone and u did all those shit to him and
u get him, or if you are not, you did all those shit,
he cheat on you and run away with another girl.
omg fuck life.. and i dunno why everything must be about this guy,
that guy, or one guy ...
Can we just live for ourself? even just once?
but not about others, but the vain cycle remains and goes on and on.....

Monday, January 21, 2013


When minutes become hours
When days become years
And I dont know where you are
Color seems so dull without you
Have we lost our minds
What have we done
But it all doesnt seem to matter anymore

When you kissed me on that street I kissed you back
You held me in your arms I held you in mine
You picked me up to lay me down
When I look into your eyes
I can hear you cry for a little bit more of you and I
Im drenched in your love
Im no longer able to hold it back

p/s : i feel pathetic enough..
fuck this feeling

Monday, January 14, 2013

New Year

They said you lose the game when you are serious
and yes, i think i lost it .
It's a new year ahead,
i have not come up with any new year resolution
because i knew things planned ahead
never works for me ..
Christmas and new year eve had been out of my expectation,
Well they always say expectation is the cause of dissapointment.
What more can i say?
After these incidents, no matter how hard i've tried to convince myself
to move on, the faith slowly fades with it.
How long can i stay? 1 month? 3 months ? a year?
fuck giving someone time, because you will
end up fucking your own life.
Its like a time bomb, it explode every time you feel insecure.
And eventually you will feel tired, no matter how long you had hold on to,
thoughts of giving up came by and there goes all the precious moments.
i wish i had the courage to make the decision
but not let someone else decide where i should be .